Are you feeling alone? Are you longing for social connections? Do you have the feeling you don’t have anyone even though you know you have many friends and loved ones? Well, let me tell you, you are not alone. In fact, I believe there are many people out there, especially long-term travellers, who from time to time feel alone even though they are not really alone. But where does this feeling come from and how do we change it? I have a theory and a step to step guide for you to overcome that loneliness and start implementing more happiness into your life.
Are you ready? Okay let’s do this.
Here’s what we will cover:
- Where does this feeling come from?
- 3 Steps to overcome loneliness
Where does this feeling come from?
As we all are different and live different lives I guess the source of feeling alone is different for everyone too.
For me I know it comes from the lifestyle I chose. I chose to travel long-term, to always be on the road, explore and discover. I actively decided to go away from home, where all my friends and family is.
Moving away and being on the go all the time results in not having access to your loved ones all the time. Sometimes friends are on the other side of the world. There is time difference and other barriers like your daily lives that get in the way of staying connected.
You might argue now that if I’m traveling you should meet so many people every day with whom I can spend time with and therefore aren’t supposed to feel alone. Well, that’s true. You meet a lot of people while traveling and most of the time they are amazing and you build lasting, strong relationships quicker than you can say hallo.
That’s the beauty of traveling, you are never alone, you met amazing people who might become your new family. I admit I’ve met some of my best friends while traveling the world.
However, just because you have many people around, doesn’t necessarily mean you don’t feel alone. How come? Well, sometimes you’re at a place where you don’t get along with the people, sometimes there’s just not many around and other times you might not have known them for long enough so you would share your deepest feelings with them.
Especially when you go places every day or two it’s hard to really connect with someone on a deeper level. Therefore, if you then need someone to be there for you and emotionally support you, you feel like no one is there because your friends are far away and the people around aren’t the right people.
But even if you’re not traveling it’s possible to feel that way sometimes. Especially when you’re living alone and your friends are too busy to spend time with you or live further away.
There really are many reasons why we can feel alone even though we have a lot of friends and family. But no matter what your personal reason is, the source is always not having someone close to you around and available when you need them.
So how can you change this? What can you do to make this feeling go away? I’ve tried some things and figured these few steps help to overcome loneliness and create more happiness.
3 Steps to overcome loneliness
Step #1: Being aware
The first step of overcoming feeling alone, in fact the first step for overcoming any challenge is being aware of your feelings and challenges.
Once you realized how you feel and why you feel this way, once you got to the bottom of your emotions it’s easy to find a solution.
However, if you don’t know what the problem is in the first place, how can you overcome it?!
So, take your time. I know this is hard sometimes as feeling inside of you can be challenging and uncomfortable. But it is necessary to find out what you truly feel and why you feel this way.
Think of your current stage of life. Think of why you might feel alone. Are there any special times when you feel that way? Maybe you just got to a new place, maybe you haven’t seen your friends in a long time. Did you go out today?
Find out what the reason is and then act upon it.
Step #2: Figure out short term solutions
The second step is to find short term solutions, to find things now to make the feeling go away so you can start being happy again.
This again is different for everyone and deeply related to the reason why you feel that way.
To find short term solutions think of the reason and then think of ways to change that term. Here are some things I like to do to make feeling alone going away immediately.
- Call a friend, call home: Talking to someone sometimes makes the difference. Especially if you haven’t left the house at all today. Just call someone and talk for a while.
- Go out: Even better than calling is going out and meeting someone. The best is if you’d meet a friend, but if there are no around, just go out and meet new people. Go to a café shop, a restaurant, a sports club, really anything where there are other people. And don’t be afraid of talking to them.
- Journal: This for sure won’t help for long, but sometimes, when feeling down, getting your thoughts on paper makes a huge difference. Write down how you feel and let your emotions go.
- Do something fun: When feeling alone the best you can do is to go out and do something fun. Or stay in and do something fun. In any case, treat yourself. Spend some hours doing something you love and something that makes you happy.
Maybe there’re some things that’ll suit you and your situation, however there’s plenty more things you can do to find short term pleasure. If you have any cool suggestions, feel free to share them with us in the comments so we can also try them out.
Now though, even though we got rid of the feeling for now, chances are high it’ll come back some time. So how can we prevent loneliness from coming?
Step #3: Figure out long term solutions
This again is also very dependable on your situation and the reasons why you feel that way. However, I’d also like to give you some suggestions on what might help.
Nevertheless, you should take some time and think hard about how you can change this situation in the long term. Maybe you need to move in a shared flat or closer to your friends and family. Maybe you need to stop traveling for a while and stay with a loved one. Or maybe you need to work more towards building stronger friendships and relationships.
Think of what you can do to make sure you always have someone important to you available if you need them.
- Work towards stronger relationships: That’s something I’ve been doing for years. Even though I’m traveling a lot and only get to see my friends a few times a year, I make sure I always stay connected and stay part of their lives by calling frequently and visiting as much as possible.
- Move in a shared flat: Now some people, including me, are just not made for living alone. I love to be alone sometimes, I definitely need my me-time and I for sure don’t want to spend 24/7 with people all the time. But I need someone around occasionally. I need someone I can talk to just to get my thoughts out of my mind. That’s why living in a shared flat is the best option for me. Maybe for you too.
- Implementing more social time: This can be attending regular classes in some area of interest. Learning a new sport or instrument. Anything. It’s all about finding a tribe. Having something regular where you can connect with likeminded people and spend some time with them.
See if some of the tips above suit you and can make a difference for you. However, don’t hesitate to come up with your own solutions. And again, I you like you can share them with us in the comments so we can to try them out.
As you can see, feeling alone sometimes definitely is not the end of the world.
We all do sometimes. And once we do we need to be aware and find the source. Then implement a positive Mindset and workout solutions.
I know feeling alone sucks and sometimes we actually are alone in times where we could need someone. However, never forget that there are many, many people out there who love you and who’d move the world to be with you. Just give them a call.
You are not alone even though you might feel that way.
Think positive, think of the amazing people you love. Reach out to them or just go and meet new amazing people.
Also think about all the other things you have in your life that make you happy. Focus on something good, something happy, something positive.
Feeling alone is only a negative emotion stored deep inside of you. Face it with joy and positivity and you’ll soon feel better and much happier.
If that doesn’t work, apply some tips from above and see it fading away.
I hope you liked the post and found some comfort in my words. If so and you know someone who feels alone from time to time, share this post so they get reminded that they are not alone.
Also feel free to connect with me on Instagram or Facebook so we can share more tips on overcoming loneliness with each other.
Make your long distance friendship work with the help of my Let’s Travel guide.
And then, see you soon!