Are you afraid of running out of time too early? Don’t worry, me too and I guess many more people. Feeling pressured by time is a normality these days and in this world, we live in. There’s just too many things we need and want to do that 24h a day and a lifetime of approximately 90 years isn’t enough. However, what if I told you that you don’t have to live under this pressure and there is one simple thing you can do to free yourself from time and take away that fear or not being able to do everything you must or want to do? Today I will share with you this little secret that completely changed my relationship with time.
My previous relationship with time
Be for I tell you what changed my thinking and I can give you some tips on how to free yourself from time, I need to tell you a little bit more about my relationship with time.
If you have been following me for a while or if you know me in person you might have heard me saying: “Time is the most important thing you have!”, in one or the other form.
I still hold this believe and I still think that time is the most precious thing you have because it will only get less.
Now, I know, this doesn’t really help the feeling of being stressed out. And if you are like me and have a trillion things you want to do and experience and if it was your choice you’d do them all now at this very moment, this statement can really do damage to your happiness.
I used to get anxious whenever I saw posts from my friends in South Africa or even strangers in South Africa. I wanted to be there so badly. And that was not the only time I had this feeling.
Quite often I caught myself wishing to be somewhere else than I was now or found myself unable to decide on which thing to focus. When it comes to the things I love doing I have a really hard time to prioritize. I can’t cut out any of them because I love doing them equally and they all benefit me in some way.
However, there are just not enough hours in a day or days in a week that I can possible manage it all. At least not to the extent that I would like to.
This then gives me anxiety because I fear not having enough time.
The thing that changed everything
Very recently I read the book “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle, and this book changed my thinking in so many ways. And I promise you, you will probably hear me talking about it many more times in the future.
In this book is all about being present and being in the now at any moment to really experience life.
A very famous quote by Tolle is “Now is the only thing you will ever have.”
And after I read this, it clicked. What I perceived as so precious all the time wasn’t time itself, but time as in this very moment.
This moment is all you will ever have. The past is gone and the future is not here yet.
Time doesn’t matter, the past and the future are not important. And by always referring to moments in past and future, by always wanting to be there somewhere not here, we create this pressure for ourselves that is totally unnecessary and self-destructing.
I want to change my statement from above a little bit and say: Now is the most important thing you have. this moment is the most precious thing in a person’s life, because it will never come back.
You don’t run out of time because time doesn’t exist. All that exists is this present moment. And some imagination of the present moment in the future and memories of the present moment in the past. However, you can’t affect the past anymore because it happened already. You can only take those things as a lesson to learn from. You also can’t predict what is happening in the future. The only way you can impact the future is by the action you take in this very moment.
Wanting to be somewhere else in past or future while you are here at this very moment is only causing unhappiness and negativity in your life.
So, I urge you, join me on this journey and stop identifying your life and yourself with what happened in the past and stop wishing to be back somewhere or at a point in the future.
Stop believing that if you’d be back to some point in your past you’d be happier. That’s simply not possible, so why bother with it.
Also stop believing that once you’ve reached a certain point in the future you will be happier. That is impossible. You will never be satisfied with what you have. That’s humans’ nature. You will always want more and want to be somewhere else. So please, accept the position you are in right now. Know that this moment is all that counts. Only now you can be happy by choosing to let go for past and future.
How you can free yourself from time and become happier
To free yourself from the past, let’s go back to my South Africa example. I know that wishing I was there or thinking too much about the time I had there isn’t going to help me. All that helps is being present. Appreciating the here and now and knowing how awesome the place is I am at in this very moment.
Of cause, it’s okay and even fun sometimes to think back to good memories, but only if those thoughts result in positive feelings. Don’t get upset when thinking back. Know how much value those times gave you. Know that those times very unique and amazing but also at the same time know that they are in the past and everything you have now is the present.
Wanting and planning to go back as well is a perfect thing to do but also only if it’s attached to positive feelings. Not if it makes you feel bad or makes you want for time to pass as quickly as possible. Rather be here in the now, enjoying where you are at and then know that when the time comes you can be completely present there. But at this very moment you can only truly be happy when you are present.
With the future, it works a little bit different as we do have control over it. At least a little bit by the decision we take in this very moment.
So, if you ever feel stressed out again because you feel like you don’t have enough time to do everything or because you feel like there are a million things you need to do right now to prevent some build up scenario in the future, stop it.
Focus on where you are at the moment. Know that what you do and how you react in this very moment will define your future. This moment is the only way in which you can control the future, so know your options.
No matter with what you are dealing, you always have three options:
Surrender to the situation. Completely accept what is and find peace in it, knowing that it belongs to your life situation.
Remove yourself from the situation. Step back, go away or simply drop what you are doing right now and come back to it at a later stage when you feel it is the right time again.
Change your situation. Take action, do what you have to do to improve your current life situation. That can be planning, talking to a person, sitting gaols, etc.
Once you start being present and listen deep inside you, you will know what the most important thing to do is right now.
By focusing on the present using every moment to its full potential by always putting purpose into every action you will automatically work towards all the things that really matter to you.
You might wonder now how goal setting fits in this concept. Goal setting and self-development are two of my main focuses here on this blog and in my life as well so of cause I needed to find out how they’d fit into my new concept of thinking. It wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be.
Goal setting is not at all a hindrance to being present. Goal setting and planning can be even the best thing you can do at some times. It’s wonderful to have ambitions, dreams and set goals to work towards. It gives your actions purpose and keeps your mind challenged and satisfied.
So, you don’t have to give that up at all. Just always remember that what counts is not if or when you achieve the goal, dream or ambition. What is important is the action you take now. Enjoy the journey towards achieving and know that it doesn’t matter whether you are successful or not. You always succeed if you manage to find joy in every action you take towards that goal, because then, even if you fail you will know that all you did was dedicated to making you happy that moment.
A very beneficial thing on this way of thinking is also that you start to take all the failures as lessons to learn from. It doesn’t matter anymore whether you achieve a goal or not because even if you fail you had fun on the way and a good lesson to learn from.
With self-development, it is similar. Wanting to improve yourself and your life situation doesn’t collude with accepting yourself and your position in this very moment. You can pretty well be fully at peace with who you are and where you are at right now and still have the wish to work towards improvement.
Real self-development and real self-love starts when you accept who you are fully and unconditionally while having the aim to take on challenges and grow as a person. Without judgement, negativity or identification you will be able to find great happiness in who you are and who you were and will become.
Don’t label yourself as anything. Love life. Just love everything. And then work towards improvement, not to change something you hate but because it is fun to set yourself challenges and reflect on yourself.
What to take away
To sum things up, the most important thing in one’s life isn’t time, it is this very moment. The presence is where happiness is found and only by seeing and fully accepting what is you will be able to free yourself from time and from all the pressure you create for yourself.
So please, do this one thing for yourself and stop referring to past or future unless it is necessary and start loving life now.
Did you like the post, was it helpful? Then feel free to share it and help me impact other people’s lives positively. Let’s together make each other happier.
Lastly, here are some more posts that will help you create more happiness and positivity. So, go check them out: