Chasing Dreams (E17): Letting go of what no longer serves you

We all want to do what we love, we all want to go out there and chase our dreams. I’ve been doing it for over 6 years now and I tell you it’s been a journey. I’ve had an amazing time, I won, I failed, I learned, I grew, I changed. Ever since I was bored I believed that time is way to precious and life is supposed to be fun and exciting. That is why I dedicated my life towards creating a lifestyle that fulfils me and teach others how to live happier and healthier too. Even though I have most of my life so far, had an amazing time and lived my dreams, there’s always been struggles and learnings. Life is a journey, and so is happiness. This series of posts are little snippets from that journey with which I hope to help and inspire you to follow you own path towards more wonders. Today’s main topic is going to be letting go. I hope you enjoy!

7th of September 2019 to 31st of August 2020

You guys it’s been a crazy year. I can’t believe it’s been almost a year since I wrote my last blogpost in this series. A lot has happened since them. First of all, I want to thank all of you for sticking around. I know I haven’t been on here so much and I apologize. I had a lot on my plate. When I got home from South Africa last year I had to overcome a heart break. It was time for me to step back and forgive, heal and move on. It took me a long time and in the midst of it I also had to work, finish university, figure out what I wanted to do after, enjoy my time at home, find a new balance, and not lose myself within all of this.

The first 5 months were really hectic. I was busy almost every day the entire day. I had school, wrote my bachelor thesis, worked part time and at the same time I was trying to figure out where I stood in life and what I wanted to do once all of this is over. It’s be rough. Although I know what my purpose is and what brings me the most joy in life, I still sometimes struggle deciding how to bring it to life. The why isn’t what’s bothering me, the what is what’s stressing me out. By January I thought I had it figured out. I would finish university in February, then travel for 4 months, do an internship after and then start my master degree while at the same time working towards getting my coaching business growing.

Well we all know what happened then… COVID was a disaster for me. I was so desperately longing for a break and a change. I needed to taste salt water on my face again and experience some other cultures. I loved and enjoyed being home but I knew it was time for me to explore again. Well, NO said COVID. So, I was lost again. My plans got cancelled, my dream got crushed, my heart struggled accepting and my mind blew up. I had such a hard time letting go of those dreams. After about a month of constantly switching between acceptance and resistance and trying so hard to figure out what I wanted to do, I decided to give it up. I surrendered.

It wasn’t easy and I still didn’t know what to do with my life and my time right now but at least I wasn’t deeply unhappy anymore. I finally managed letting go and the resistance was gone and inner peace and acceptance filled up its space. I started a passion project which I called STOKE Challenge. Over the course of a month I worked towards acceptance and integrating more joy, forgiveness, patience and trust into my every day. By the end of the month I felt so much better. I had found my balance again. I was hopeful, happier and grateful again for these amazing chances that came with COVID. But I still felt like I was wasting my time because I didn’t do anything. I was finished in school, I stopped working, I wasn’t exploring…

So, I had to find myself some things to do, and not just anything but something that’ll use my time wisely. I decided to start my master degree since traveling didn’t seem to be an option for a long time. I also enrolled in a Coaching Certification Course to expand my knowledge and skill set to be able to serve my clients even better. I made a plan on where I wanted to be with my business in the next few months and started working towards that. This new plan really gave me some more purpose, but I still felt the burn out slowly approaching. I still haven’t had the break and change that I so desperately needed. That greatly affected my mood and even though I was doing things I enjoyed, that gave me purpose and drove me further, I still felt that frustration, motivation and resistance inside. It got even worse after boarders in Europe opened and I was stuck at home while all my friends went out there traveling. I was frustrated and angry. I started questioning what I did and got really confused and restless because I was constantly going from “this is exactly what I need” to “I want to be somewhere else”… This all reached its point when I started my internship. I now had even less time for the small things that kept me joyful and was stuck in a job and life I didn’t want to live. But what’s there to do about…

Well I have to sit through it. It’s gonna pass and then I at least know what to do. Because if there is only one good thing coming from all of this, then it is me knowing what I want to do. At least for the next few years. But that’s another story…

Now let’s sum up what I learned throughout those few months. There’s obviously a lot of things, that I will all share with you over the years, but here’s to start:

On letting go

There is no point in holding on to what no longer is an option. It is hard to accept the present moment and what has already happened when it’s not the way we hoped it to be, but there is no point in resisting. The best and only thing you can do is to trust in your path. To trust that everything you need will come, that you are strong enough to deal with it, that what matters will stay of come back. Letting go of constantly wanting to be somewhere else, doing something else, be someone else. The secret lies in trusting that you are on the right path, no matter how that looks like and that everything that is supposed to be will be. In its own pace. Simply letting go will help you immensely in terms of feeling happier and more joyful and it will also make it easier to just live life as it is. With all its ups and downs.

Life doesn’t have to be as hard as you make it for yourself sometimes

Especially when things suck, but also when everything is okay, we tend to make things harder for ourselves than they actually are. Our mind tends to focus on the negative rather than the positive, it wants what we don’t have instead of appreciating what we have. We constantly overthink, want to be somewhere else and judge the present moment. We make life harder for ourselves than it actually is. But by letting go of those ideas and expectations and the pressure we put on ourselves we can go back to simply enjoying life as it is and thus welcome more happiness into our lives. So whenever you feel life is hard and you put too much pressure on yourself and thus make it even harder, here are some affirmations:

Change is part of life and it’s okay to let it happen

We can’t always control what’s happening. Life has its own will. All we can do is surrender, accept and let it happen. If we continue resisting change we will only make ourselves unhappy. But if we welcome it with open arms, let of the ideas we held on to and open up to what’s to come, change can be an amazing opportunity for you to reflect, move forward and be happy.

Your thoughts and doubts are just things you say to yourself 

Sometimes, especially when things get hard, our mind gets super active and super negative at the same time. But knowing that those thoughts and feelings aren’t facts can change everything. It will help you let go of them and choose whether you engage with them or not. No one forces you to believe what your mind is telling you. So, choose not to. You have the power to choose how you feel at this moment. An no one and not anything can that take away from you! You can’t be unhappy and happy at the same time. But you can be sad and happy at the same time. You can’t feel negativity/anxious or sad at the same time as being present. You can’t feel unhappy and be present at the same time because ultimately becoming present means letting go of the past and the future. So, I urge you, give yourself the opportunity to be happy by letting go of your thoughts and feelings. Repeat those affirmations to for more inner peace:

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Thank you for reading. I hope you could take something valuable out of this post and feel a bit more inspired and positive. If that’s the case, help me spread the word and share this post.

Also I’d love to connect with you on Social Media, so reach out and let’s have a chat!

Lastly, if you feel the call to work with someone on your mindset and your happiness, I am here for you. I have some wonderful tools and techniques that will help you build a stronger, more resilient mindset and introduce more happiness and health into your life. So go ahead and reach out. We can have a short chat and I will answer all your questions and we can talk about how we can make this happen.

Other than that, enjoy your day and lots of love!

Xx,